IS SEX GOOD FOR YOU

Dr Gabrielle Morrissey fields a reader's question and discusses why sex is good for all of us.

(Q) My husband is pretty conservative when it comes to sex and finds lots of excuses not to have it. It's strange, I know. I think he's a bit embarrassed by it, but also he was raised in a strict, religious family, and while he says he believes sex isn't sinful, I think he's been brainwashed that it is because he's not comfortable talking about it or even doing it. I've tried seducing him and that sometimes works, and I've tried to convince him we should have regular sex because it's good for us, especially since we're getting on a bit, but he doesn't believe me. He thinks sex is dirty, bad and unhealthy. But it's a good thing, isn't it? It doesn't just feel good, it is actually healthy for us, right? Can you give me some reasons to encourage my husband to have more sex?

(A) Well, you can show your husband this in print: you're right and he's wrong. Sex is absolutely healthy for us. Sexual activity is one of life's wellbeing tonics. Most of us focus on the feelings of pleasure and connection that sex brings, but actually, there is a lot more about sex that is good for us. Physically there are many benefits:

Heart

Lovemaking is good aerobic exercise and the sexual response keeps your circulatory system toned. Sexually active people suffer fewer heart attacks.

Weight

Sexual activity can ("can" not "will") burn between 600 to 2300 kilojoules, depending on what you're doing and for how long. At the very least, it's a more entertaining way to keep fit than the treadmill! (But it should not replace the treadmill as a physical fitness activity).

Pain relief

Endorphins released during orgasm make us feel "high" and can provide relief of mild to moderate pain from various conditions such as arthritis, backaches and headaches.

Cancer

Research is still in development, but studies show that in women, the oxytocin released from orgasm prevents breast cancer tissue cells from developing tumours. Studies have been conducted on women with cancer, and further research on women who do not have cancer is still pending. In men, research shows ejaculation keeps the prostate healthy and helps prevent prostate cancer by halting the build-up of toxins and carcinogens in the prostate.

Mental and emotional relief

Neurochemicals released from both orgasm and the sensation of touch can alleviate a mild case of "the blues" (serious and clinical depression must be properly treated by a doctor). Hormones released during the sexual arousal response act as disinhibitors, ease fears and anxieties, and increase a sense of calm and wellbeing.

Stress reduction

Regular sexual expression, including intercourse but not limited to it, boosts immune cells, reduces physical and emotional stress and helps us fight off illness. Most people turn away from having sex when they are stressed, when in fact having sex is a great stress reliever.

A long and happy life

Sex helps the body last longer, especially the heart and circulatory system, but also our brain, nervous system and muscles. Sex can make us feel confident, happy, fulfilled, connected, youthful and vibrant, adding to our desire to live well throughout our lives, and for longer.

Your husband may be misinformed but he's not alone. Many people are taught to believe that sex is sinful, "dirty" and therefore not good for us.

But sex is how we got here and so evolution has adapted sex to encourage us to do it - and not just because it feels good, but because it is good for us. So share this information with your partner and you'll hopefully go and enjoy a lot more great-feeling, as well as good-for-you sex!

Discover more from our sex and relationship expert Dr Gabrielle Morrissey here.